


The Haircut

by Renebu



Series: Tumblr Pårn Anon Stories [6]
Category: Raske Menn, Ylvis
Genre: AU, F/M, Fluff, Heterosexual Sex, Smut, no wives no kids
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-06
Updated: 2015-09-06
Packaged: 2018-04-19 11:16:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,903
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4744298
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Renebu/pseuds/Renebu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Calle is home alone, devastated by the UNICEF Bolleklipp on IKMY. A little fantasy about how his hot, short haircut came to be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Haircut

**Author's Note:**

> Started by a lovely anon who left me hanging months ago. I decided to finish the story myself!

It'd been snowing like crazy all day long, and you could barely wait to show him all of your Christmas treasures. You set them down gingerly as you unlock the door, humming "All I Want for Christmas is You." As the door squeaks open, you grab the bags' handles in one swoop and slide in, not wanting to let any of the delicious warmth of your home escape.  
You peel off your outer layers excitedly, where the snowflakes that had landed were quickly finding out what Olaf the snowman wanted so badly to discover. You fling your jacket over the back of the couch and are surprised to find that he's not sitting there, watching some dumb comedy special. Your attention turns to the powder room when his sigh echoes through the house. You turn to see him run his fingers through his noticeably shorter hair.

"Calle... your hair." He hears your voice, and you catch his eyes in the mirror. "I know. I look utterly ridiculous." Another sigh. "What am I going to do?" You rub your fingers on his tips, not believing that it's actually gone. "It doesn't look that bad, you know." "Don't fuck with me, Rene’. They did this on purpose, to make me look as ridiculous as possible." Your lips curve into a smile. "It doesn't have to be that way." You peck him on the nose and run to the junk drawer in the kitchen.

His eyes widen in horror as he sees you approach with a pair of scissors. "You trust me, don't you?" You coo. His lips stiffen and his shoulders drop. You grab a stool along the way, set it in front of you, and motion for him to come sit. Begrudgingly, he comes, and you set to work, fixing the horrid bowl cut into something more... palatable.

That's not to say that the hair didn't suit him - he has a face that could rock whatever the Ylvisåker brothers could throw at him. But if they were going to mess with his long locks, you were going to find a way to maximize his new do. After about twenty minutes or so, you give him a once, twice, three times over, you nod approvingly. "Not bad, if I do say so myself!" Calle tries to stand, but you ask him to wait so that you can grab the hand mirror. He obliges.

You count down from three before handing it to him. You're pretty proud of the shape you gave him, and you think that the bowl cut might be a blessing in disguise, because it gave you the option to create this new look, which rivals if not surpasses his longer hair style. "Well, well, well..." he says, examining carefully, and you see a smile peek through for the first time since you arrived. "You're just full of surprises, aren't you?"

You can't help but bite your bottom lip at the sight of him. You've done a bang up job and it only makes him that much hotter. "I had great material to work with." You put the stool away and go to grab the broom but his hand catches your wrist. Your gaze moves from his hand to the look on his face, and that glimmer in his eye tells you that he's about to show you a surprise of his own.

He pulls you in close as if you were dance partners in a ballroom competition. He brings your hands to his shoulders and rests his palms on your lower back. He pauses, letting the tension between you build until the electricity flowing between you pulls him into your lips. He guides you towards the wall so that he can use it as leverage to wrap your legs around him. This is when you feel his first surprise - although you ought to have seen that one coming.

Your eyes widen as his bulge presses against you, and you wrap yourself tighter around him. “Oh my, it feels like you have something special for your hairdresser!” “Just a generous tip for a job well done, my dear,” Calle replies, catching your lips in an appreciative kiss as you giggle in delight. You both soon feel the effects of the haircut, as the tiny remnants of his once luscious locks have invaded your mouths and are making your faces itch.

Calle laughs as he helps you get back on your feet, “I guess we should go rinse off, huh?” You lock eyes with each other while he helps you remove your shirt and you unbuckle his pants. The rest of your clothes soon follow and join the rest of Calle’s hair on the floor. As many times as you’ve seen each other in the buff, there is still a thrill when you strip down to nothing.

After he starts up the shower to bring it to a good steam, he stops for a moment to catch a long look at the pair of you in the mirror, “I just realize why this cut looks so good… it is exactly like yours!” You didn’t intend to, but you did indeed give him the same sleek coif you’ve had for years. His hands run through your short dark tresses and his blue eyes gaze into the reflection of your brown orbs in the mirror as you smile back at him, “Now we’re more of a matched set.”

You step into the walk-in shower and allow the steaming jets to engulf you both. The pressure feels great after a long day. Calle gets directly under the stream to rinse all the stray hairs away. He looks so different with this new cut, but he is still your Smoke and Honey Man, no matter what. You soon get back to the business at hand, pulling him close, rubbing yourself against his hip as you grab his tight ass. He chuckles in approval and reciprocates, clenching your rear with his talented hands.

Calle reaches for the shower gel and soon you are helping each other lather up, hands exploring all parts to make sure you are squeaky clean, washing your bodies and your minds from the stress of the day. Both of you titter and squirm when the other reaches a ticklish spot. When the lather is all rinsed away, Calle pulls you in for a close hug, and you begin a slow dance as he hums a soothing tune in your ear, water cascading down your bodies.

Continuing his serenade, he turns off the shower and wraps a towel around your back, leading you onto the bath rug and carefully patting you dry from head to toe. He then hands you his towel with a smile, and you do the same to him, taking care to towel dry his newly shorn locks. He bends down so you can reach the top of his head, and suddenly he lifts you up over his shoulder in a fireman’s carry as you shriek in surprise. 

He carries you out into the bedroom, laughing as he tosses you on the bed and climbs on top of you, connecting his full lips to yours in a passionate kiss. “Much better without the hair in our mouths, don’t you think?” he chuckles and you return the kiss in agreement, running your fingers through his damp hair. The air is chilly around you, making the heat of your bodies even more pronounced. You pull him in closer to increase the body heat.

In a swift move, Calle extends his long arms, grabbing the edges of the duvet to cocoon you both, making you giggle. You couldn’t feel more refreshed and clean, wrapped with your lover in the soft cotton. Under the dark of the covers, your mouths find each other again, feeling each other’s smiles through playful kisses. “Now it is finally time to give a proper gratuity to my hairstylist,” Calle whispers in your ear before nibbling your lobe, and the goosebumps rise on your flesh as his tongue continues a slow, tender trail down your neck. Resting his cheek on your chest, he pauses to listen to your heartbeat as his hands caress your breasts. “I like that rhythm, Rene’, you are definitely alive!”  
You reach again where his beautiful mane used to be. The boy cut feels strange in your hands, your scalp massage eliciting moans from him as he continues kissing down your belly. You silently lament losing the long, silky locks you love, but you know they’ll grow back eventually. At this point you can’t think about much except the immense pleasure in your loins now that his chin is tickling your most sensitive zone.

Calle teases you, bypassing your aching mound and moving to kiss your ticklish hip, his hands gripping your soft thighs as you happily struggle. He gives equal treatment to the other side, then finally returns to where you want him most. Strong hands gently open your legs and his talented tongue greedily explores your pussy. He breathes in deeply, taking in your scent, warming you with his hot breath on the exhale. You can’t control the sounds emanating from your throat as Calle resumes humming his earlier tune, the vibrations adding more to your pleasure.

While his tongue continues its magic work, his long, slender fingers make their way inside you. Your groans of approval please Calle; the fervor of his efforts increase, sending you over the top. Wailing his name at the top of your lungs, you dig your fingers into his muscular shoulders as your hips grind involuntarily against his face and hands.

Pulling himself away, he stands up, panting, and whips off the duvet. The chill bites your heated skin and adds to your thrill, watching his sculpted, short-haired form framed by the dim moonlight in the window. You can barely catch your breath as he grabs your ankles to pull you to the edge of the bed, growling as he enters you, leaning into you and bringing his face close to yours. His new bangs bounce against his forehead with each thrust, and even though it is dark you can see the sparkle in his blue eyes.

There are no words, just guttural grunts and moans from both of you as his hard cock fills you perfectly and the friction of your bodies quickly brings you to another massive climax. Your whole body stiffens as Calle continues to pound through your pleasure, and you watch his expressive face contort until he explodes inside of you, screaming in triumph. He collapses on the bed flat on his back, coughing and gasping for air. You bring the duvet back over you to preserve your heat, with just your heads peeking out from under the covers. It is several minutes before either of you can breathe normally. This turn of events was certainly not what you expected out of the evening!

After you both drift off for a few minutes, you awake facing each other, and you run your fingers through Calle’s hair. He is reminded again of his charity cut, and brings his hand up to feel your work, cupping your chin in the other hand. “Just so you know, Rene’, I’m never paying cash for a haircut again. You are on permanent retainer.” You smile back at him, “Well then, there is fantastic incentive to keep your hair short, my darling!”


End file.
